Tantrum + Good Weather = Plans for Friday

I think I can speak for all of us: it's a relief to FINALLY see the rivers of melted snow flowing down the street. A look at the forecast reveals high temperatures in the 37º to 50º (!) range over the next week, so those rivers will continue to run.

Speaking of weather, we were kind enough to postpone last week's Tantrum show so you good people didn't have to brave what was billed to be the coldest weather in 20 years. (It fell a bit short of that, but still--we were thinking of you.)

Now, we'll be performing on a much more pleasant evening in Westport. Come check us out!

Our special guest is Michael Byars, host of KCUR's Morning Edition. He will tell true stories based on your suggestions, which will serve as the basis for our improvised scenes.

Friday, January 15th
8pm
Westport Coffee House Theater
$10
May contain adult content
Call 913-678-8886 for reservations

Bowling

I’ve been a bowler on and off since my teens. I started bowling in youth leagues at 13 or 14. My first job was as a porter and occasional maintenance guy at a bowling alley. My second “real job”* was also as a porter and occasional maintenance guy at a different bowling alley.

*I don’t count the epic FAILure that was one summer as a cutlery salesperson.

I even managed a stint at the pool hall/game room of yet another local bowling alley as a stopgap when I was in college.

One of the perks of working in a bowling alley was…well, free bowling. And I took major advantage of this as a kid. I mean, what else is a broke-assed 16-year-old working part time for minimum wage going to do with his free time? I once bowled 29 games in succession on a Sunday afternoon.

I bowled a league every year until I was about 20, at which time it got a little more difficult. The main issue with league bowling is the commitment: the standard league runs from about September to May.

That’s committing the same night every week for a SCHOOL YEAR (roughly 36 weeks).

It’s tough, and it’s the main reason some bowling alleys are closing and others are forced to reinvent themselves.

I came back to bowl for a few years in my late 20s, and I had a good time with the friends on my team. However, every year I found my enthusiasm waning big time around February with, like, 14 weeks to go.

Like many things in life that are fun yet time-consuming, eventually burnout sets in. I had fallen out of love with bowling. Something I used to do on a weekly basis had become an occasional happening at best. Eventually, it didn’t even register on my mental list of fun ways to spend a couple hours on a weekend afternoon.

But the week of Christmas, before the “snow events”, I got out of work early. When I pulled into the garage, I happened to notice my bowling stuff. I hadn’t used it in over a year and a half.

I thought, “What the hell.”

I got to the bowling alley and put on my shoes. My bowling ball no longer fits quite right, a combination of a little weight loss and a little reduction in finger size caused by…well, not bowling.

But I made it work. My second throw after all that time off followed an arc out toward the gutter, then hooked abruptly right into the pocket. My first strike of the day.

As I got warm, the ball came off my hand with more speed and more spin. It started to feel “right” again. I had the familiar feeling of people’s eyes watching—the kids two lanes over; the employees behind the counter—as strikes lined up consecutively on the overhead monitor.

The first real game I’ve bowled in 18 months was a 237.

It was exhilarating to suddenly be back in that element.

I followed with a 215 and a 256. 708 series? Like riding a bike.

I paid for my games and went home. It took me all of 40 minutes to bowl.

When I got home, I opened the hatch of my car. Before I reached in to pull my bowling stuff out of the back, I paused for a moment.

I looked at the deceptively heavy black bag, and how many memories I have tied to bowling in general.

I thought back to the satisfaction of bowling well just moments before, of giving the scrawny kids two lanes over a bit of a show.

I smiled and put the bag back on the shelf, in a place slightly more conspicuous than where it was before.

National Championship Game Thoughts

1. Texas wins last night with Colt McCoy. Look, the 18-year-old kid who replaced him did the best he could. But his nerves were painfully obvious. Almost every ball he threw was either way too hard (dude, he’s 20 feet away…you might want to take a little off) or right into the turf (squeezing the ball too hard leads to holding it a bit too long which causes the nose of the ball to head right for the ground). I’m not blaming him at all. I can’t imagine being in that situation unexpectedly a mere 8 months after leaving HIGH SCHOOL.

Despite all that, he had a real chance to tie or go ahead with a successful drive in the last two minutes. Hell, merely subtracting the ill-advised shovel pass at the end of the first half makes this a completely different game.

2. Alabama isn’t dominant. (I’m not saying Texas is.) Their quarterback isn’t good. Their running game certainly is, but once a defense keys in on that it can be contained. And Texas’ offense still moved the ball on Alabama’s overrated defense with an 18-year-old freshman misfiring most of the game. There just wasn’t a dominant team in college football this year…and strangely, there were 5 undefeated teams.

3. I changed channels at halftime, figuring the game was over. I checked back late in the 3rd quarter. The game was definitely not over.

4. Alabama punching in another TD with less than a minute was a punk move. They could have just kneeled on the ball and gone home. Stuff like that can end up getting your players hurt.

5. Does anyone seriously think that Boise State and TCU couldn’t hang with either of these teams?

January Beer Dinner

We had yet another good time at McCoy’s Brewmaster Dinner last night. The two of us were seated at a fun table with another beer-loving couple (we met them at the Schlafly dinner several months ago) and McCoy’s blogger/Facebooker/social-media-guru-in-chief.

We started with Harvest Dance, one of Boulevard’s seasonal Smokestack series beers. It’s a wheat wine, and it went nicely with the roasted butternut squash, pumpkin walnut bread, and Basque cheese.

Next was a duck confit over pastry and a small salad paired Arcadia’s Cereal Killer Barleywine. This beer is now on tap at the Foundry, thanks to the new tap towers they installed. They now have an additional 12 or so beers on tap, so check the board next time you’re in there—you’re likely to stumble across a few brews you haven’t tried.

This course was followed by McCoy’s 10th Anniversary Ale, paired with roasted pork over white cheddar grits. The interesting thing about this beer is that McCoy’s 10th anniversary was over 3 years ago. They brewed a massive IPA that year, and sold it all...except for one keg. That keg hadn’t been moved (let alone tapped!) since then. It has matured to about 13% ABV, and the hop character has melted away. As the brewmaster put it, it’s pretty much barleywine at this point.

(It’s also still on tap if you want to try it, but it likely won’t last long.)

Finally, we had Avery’s Mephistopheles paired with a raspberry beer-a-misu, which is about what you’d imagine. This is one beer I’d never tried, mostly because I was put off by the $10 per 12 oz. price tag (and that's in the liquor store). It was big, dark, delicious, and dangerous. Somewhere over 15% ABV.

And that was the only problem with the event. When you’re drinking such small quantities of highly potent beer, you tend to lose track of where you’re at as far as consumption goes.

The line between “happy” and “holy crap” is a mere half-glass thick, as I experienced shortly after the event.

I had a lovely time talking (progressively more loudly, natch) to friends new and old last night.

I had a less lovely time waking up in the middle of the night with the gurgly stomach, sweaty forehead, and racing pulse of someone who had consumed a bit too much unpasteurized beer on a school night.

It’s a conundrum—should I keep enjoying these monthly events on work nights, knowing that I still outkick my coverage occasionally when it comes to drinking?

P.S.
The next Red X wine tasting is Thursday, February 11th from 5-7pm. :)

Weather By the Numbers

Weather fascinates me. I like storms and such, but I find myself more intrigued by data and statistics — especially when it comes to extremes.

I think it hearkens back to my childhood, which found me spending inordinate numbers of hours reading the backs of baseball cards. For example, did you know George Brett was born May 15, 1953 in Wheeling, WV? I haven’t looked that up since 1st grade, if you were wondering.

But I digress.

This fun little winter spell we’ve been experiencing had me wondering about the context of the snow and cold snap.

(All forthcoming data is based on KCI measurements.)

With forecasters predicting lows this weekend anywhere from -9º to -16º, the possibility is certainly there for a dip to double-digit negative temps.

Did you know…the last time we were in double digits below zero was January 28, 1997—pert near 13 years ago? Yep. We hit -14º that day.

We got quite a dumping of snow in December, including 7” on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

Did you know…December 2009 was the 3rd snowiest December on record? With 15.1”, last month trailed only December 1961 (16.6”) and December 1918 (16.4”).

This is a bit less related to current weather, but it’s interesting to see the extremes of years past. I know a better indication of the “harshness” of a season would be, say, December of 2002 combined with January and February of 2003, but that’s too much work. I’ll work backward from 2008 (2009 data is incomplete); the numbers are as follows:

2008: High temp = 97º. Number of days it got above 90º = 15. Low temp = -4º. Number of days it got below 0º = 5.
2007: 102º (40); -3º (3).
2006: 104º (58); 4º (0).
2005: 99º (38); -5º (1).
2004: 95º (10); -4º (4).
2003: 106º (48); -9º (3).
2002: 103º (62); -4º (1).
2001: 100º (34); -6º (2).
2000: 106º (47); -9º (7).

A couple more tidbits:

My fiancée moved here from Minnesota in mid-2004. The absurdly mild summer that year was completely deceptive and may have played some small role in keeping her here. Thank you, Mother Nature.

The cold isn’t going to let up for at least several more days, but keep this in mind: every year since 2000, it has hit at least 60º at some point in January. Hell, it’s even hit 70º twice (in 2003 and 2009).

Holiday Recap

Anyone else wondering how the hell we got to 2010 so quickly?

Quick holiday recap: the in-laws braved the ice rink that is I-35 in December to make the trek from Minnesota. The thought behind this was to avoid the general nastiness that is MN weather over the holidays.

Yeah. (Though to be fair, it was worse up there.)

My sister- and brother-in-law are considering moving down here soon, in part to avoid the 6 months of winter pain they experience every year in Duluth. We alternated laughing and rolling our eyes that they had to experience the biggest snowfall KC has seen in a decade.

Such is life, I guess.

We got to make Christmas dinner, and we took the opportunity to veer from tradition a bit. We did roasted butternut squash with thyme and a little blue cheese, a wonderful turkey-sausage-based dressing, and this brined pork loin with molasses-mustard glaze, sour mash sauce and apple butter. We happened upon some holiday special on Food Network at a time when we were trying to figure out what we wanted on the menu, and seeing this pork loin being prepared was a happy coincidence. It was phenomenal. There was also a delicious from-scratch apple pie consumed.

For the second year in a row, weather managed to delay delivery of an item we ordered. This time, it was living room furniture. It’s ridiculously cozy, and can be arranged as 4 separate pieces or all together as shown (stock photo; chick, dude, and popcorn not included):

This came in handy; thanks to all the fun weather and some accumulated time off, we watched an inordinate number of movies. We never get to watch movies, so this was a treat. Bonus? We liked all of them.

We went out to see:
Up In the Air (extremely well-done, and hits home as someone who’s spent more time than most in airports)
Duck Soup (part of Tivoli’s Meal and a Movie plan from last post; absurd, pointless, yet strangely funny Marx Brothers action)

We stayed in to see:
Up (part funny, part sad; surprisingly deep and moving. Fabulous.)
Inglourious Basterds (Tarantino is the best at making you feel THAT tense throughout a 20-minute scene in which nothing but dialogue happens. Great film.)
District 9 (inventive story/allegory; vaporizing humans never looked like so much fun.)
The Hangover (good, but didn’t live up to all the hype I’ve heard since it was released)

*sigh*

Time to get back to the gym…and the corresponding resolution crowd for the next 4-6 weeks.

Westport Is Fun

We spent close to 12 hours in Westport Saturday, and I must say it was a lovely time.

11:30am: Lunch at one80 with a good friend/archivist.

12:45pm: Movie at Tivoli (Some Like It Hot). They are doing a "Movie and a Meal" promotion for the next three weeks - go see a matinee of Casablanca, Duck Soup, or Breakfast at Tiffany's, then take a coupon to just about any Westport eatery and enjoy a discount meal before or after the show.

2:30pm: Hot, caffeine-abundant drink at Broadway Café.

2:50pm: Antiques store stop with aforementioned friend/archivist and his friend. He bought some more crap to archive; she bought a Luke Perry 90210 doll. Both left happy.

3:45pm: Stopped by the high-end kitchen store just north of the Riot Room to get ideas for our remodel that should take place any decade now, but we had to window shop because the place closed at 3pm.

4:00pm: Went to a very busy World Market to buy various snacks and miscellany for the family holiday visit.

4:40pm: Went to the Foundry, met up with good friends to have food, drinks, and candy.

7:30pm: Started drinking.

Sometime around 8pm: First group of good friends dispersed for the evening, but second group began to form at the tables directly behind us.

Sometime around 9:30pm: I had consumed enough Winter Warmers to start talking a little too loud and a little too much. Who cares; I was happy.

10:30pm: Went home.

Expensive Beer, Cheap Wine

Besides Swedish furniture, we also picked up some booze in Minnesota. Nationally, beer is distributed according to state laws, licenses, and proximity, so each state has a different mix of breweries from which to choose. Therefore, I knew what I had to do: go to Beer Advocate to research beer-friendly liquor stores in the Twin Cities area.

After weighing the ratings and geography, we decided to stop at Blue Max Liquors in Burnsville, near the I-35E/W split as you approach the cities from the south. It was a smaller store than I expected (rather cramped for space), but the selection did not disappoint.

In fact, I had a hard time deciding what all to purchase. After filling a certain beer blogger’s order, we bought a bunch of different stuff. Having heard all sorts of great things about Surly (mostly here) I knew that we would buy a 4-pack of each just to try them out. I’ve been very pleased with the smoothness of Bender, the peppery Saison(ish) flavor of CynicAle, and the hop blast of Furious. Haven’t tried the Coffee Bender yet.

Among other things we picked up (sorry the pictures suck):

Dark Horse “One”. Labeled an oatmeal stout ale, this stuff is syrupy. In texture and flavor, it is only slightly less intense than your average imperial stout. Very good.


Brau Bros. Braun Ale. I liked this one too. Dangerously drinkable and tasty. A malty brown, not a lot of hop presence.



Gray’s BULLY PORTER. Really. I had to pick this up, for obvious reasons. Interestingly, it is on the opposite end of the spectrum from our hometown’s namesake. Whereas Boulevard’s version has a dominantly dry-hopped flavor, this one is a bit on the sweet side. It’s a nice beer.


I picked up a bunch of other stuff too.

As I hauled the shopping cart to the register, I asked the fellow ringing me up how long Darkness (Surly’s Imperial Stout and one of the most elusive beers around) lasted on the shelves. The guy manning the next register said they received 5 cases (60 750-ml bottles) of the stuff at the end of October and sold it in 24 hours. I nodded my head and smiled, when suddenly my cashier told me to hold on for just a minute. He disappeared, and the other guy said, “I think he’s going to see Santy Claus”, in his Minnesota accent.

A couple minutes later, our cashier reappeared and said, quietly and secretively, “Do you want one? I can sell you ONE,” adding his index finger for emphasis.

He told the manager we were buying $160 worth of beer, so apparently we surpassed the secret Darkness threshold. I’m surprised no code words or secret handshakes were involved. It turns out they held a sixth case back for employees to sell themselves and potentially cellar for next year.

Of course, even at $18, I bought it.

The manager then came out and said, “I also have some of this.” He held up a bottle of Life & Limb, a collaboration between Dogfish Head and Sierra Nevada.

“The state of Minnesota got 5 cases. I got one of them. Would you like a bottle?”

Well, duh.

So we walked out about $200 lighter.

Referring back to the title of this post…our next stop was at Trader Joe’s. We bought a case (12 bottles) of wine.

It cost $68.

With tax.

No Three Buck Chuck either. We do draw a line somewhere; that stuff is awful. Especially when, for $2 or $3 more, you can drink a totally passable bottle of wine (at least for our apparently unrefined palates).

Next Red X Wine Tasting Tomorrow Night

The next Red X Wine Tasting is 5pm-7pm TOMORROW, Thursday, December 10th. There will be pizza and perhaps more wine afterward in Parkville. It’s what we do. Read more here.

Feelin' Minnesota: The Aftermath

I have some catching up to do.

-The trip to Minnesota was a success. We got a metric crapload of stuff at IKEA, Trader Joe’s, and Blue Max Liquors. The rental minivan strained to keep up with the sheer mass and weight of all this tightly-packed, mass-produced Swedish goodness:


We got to see the Minnesota side of our family and spend a little quality time with everyone. It was really nice, the weather cooperated, and the Happy Gnome is a highly recommended stop for great food and beer—lots of local produce and a thoughtful selection of brews on tap.

-IKEA assembly was mostly a success. We bought a bedroom set for the spare room (bed + 2 dressers):


an entire office “suite”:



miscellaneous light fixtures and lamps (not pictured), and a TV "wall" for the living room.

Everything went smoothly…except the TV stand portion of the wall. Here it is after I assembled it the first time:


The furniture was listed as 15-3/4” deep on the box, website…everywhere. The problem is that the shelf the TV is to sit on is only 7” deep. Even the stand for a flat screen is considerably bigger (ours is about 12” deep). There is no mention of this anywhere. The only way for anyone to use this furniture as intended is to mount the TV directly onto the back of this shelf as if it is a wall. The problem, of course, is that there is also no mention of this fact ANYWHERE. Worse, it would require 2 additional rails, which of course would require another visit to IKEA or a huge shipping fee.

We decided to improvise instead. She used a router to cut a hole in the bottom of the board that would be behind the TV. This would allow us to slip the TV stand below it, mostly unnoticeably.



Of course, this unique, contoured board with specially-measured holes and couplings then fell to the ground and snapped in two.

Yeah.

The next day, she bought a bracket at Home Depot to repair the board, at least enough so that we could be done with it. We also had to make holes in the board for wires because they stuck too far out of the back of the TV. Fortunately the TV itself hides all this:


End result, with side elements added:


Honestly, it looks great. That said, you may want to stay away from the Besta line @ IKEA. We’ve now had two major problems with products in this line, and being so far away from a store it's not easy to resolve them.

More to come (about things other than IKEA) once I find the time.