Hilarious.

So the Yankees are going to land C.C. Sabathia after all.

It’s just laughable. The Yankees missed the playoffs for the first time since 1993 (meaning poor Derek Jeter did not play in October for the first time in his vastly overrated career) and this is how they reload.

I hate them. I hate everything about them. I hate that the stadium is half full of Yankees fans when they come to town. I hate seeing little kids wearing—get this—a Johnny Damon Yankees shirt. In Kansas City. Seriously.

I hate that our big hope is finding a setup guy when we don’t have a single player on the roster who will threaten our pathetic franchise home run record. If you didn’t know, that mark is still held by Steve “Bye-Bye” Balboni with 36. This is the lowest franchise-record-total of the 30 MLB teams. This occurred in 1985 – the Royals' championship year, but also the last year the Royals made the playoffs. This brings me to my real point.

I hate that the Royals don’t matter. I hate that there are now college graduates who have not been alive for a Royals playoff game. I hate that the Royals’ ineptitude has driven local kids to root for teams like the Yankees. That would have been unthinkable in the late ‘70s and early ‘80s. I hate that nearly every “small market” team has contended at some point in the last 12 years, when spending disparities really started to get out of hand (no, 2003 doesn’t count for the Royals—it was a total fluke).

I hope Dayton Moore can work some magic, but please forgive my pessimism in the meantime.

A few months ago I was sitting with two friends, and I had an epiphany: I have never in my life been less interested in baseball than I am now. It hurts me to say that.